劍橋商務(wù)英語BEC中級寫作.doc

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BEC中級寫作電子講義 第一講 BEC寫作概述 本課程安排簡介 寫作共6次課，第1次講概述。 BEC寫作簡介： 1 寫作目的與要求 1 Can make notes that are useful to both him/herself and to colleagues. 2 Can write most letters he/she is likely to be asked to do; such errors as occur will not prevent understanding of the message. 3 Can write a simple report. 寫作考試共進行45分鐘，占總成績的25%，小作文占10分，大作文占20分。 更多的報名信息和成績查詢方法請上網(wǎng)了解：www.neea.edu.cn 教育部考試中心 2 測試范圍與選材 1、身份介紹 (Personal Identification) 2、 工作環(huán)境與日常事務(wù) (The office，general business，environment and routine) 3、接待與閑暇活動 (Entertainment of clients，free time，relationships with colleagues and clients) 4、商務(wù)旅行 (Travel) 5、健康 (Health) 6、購買與銷售 (Buying and selling) 7、公司結(jié)構(gòu)、系統(tǒng)及程序 (Company structures，systems，processes) 8、產(chǎn)品與服務(wù) (Products and services) 9、成果與成就 (Results and achievements) 其外，還會涉及其他的一般商務(wù)話題（Business issues）。 3 測試題型分析  An Overview of BEC Vantage Writing PART Functions/Communicative Task Input Response Register 1 Business Correspondence: e.g. giving instructions, explaining a development, asking for comments, requesting information, agreeing to requests Rubric only (plus layout of output text type) Note, message, memo or e-mail (40-50 words) Neutral/ informal 2 Correspondence: e.g. explaining, apologising, reassuring, complaining Report: describing, summarising Proposal: describing, summarising, recommending, persuading One or more pieces of input from: business correspondence (medium may be letter, fax or e-mail), internal communication (medium may be note, memo, or e-mail), notice, advert, graphs, chart, etc. (plus layout if output is fax or e-mail) Business correspondence (medium may be letter, fax or e-mail) or short report or proposal (medium may be memo or e-mail) (120-140 words) Neutral/ formal 題型： 1．商務(wù)便條類； 2．商務(wù)便函類；3．商務(wù)書信類；4. 商務(wù)報告類 注意：BEC不是單純的英語考試，也不是考察商務(wù)知識。 對策：學(xué)習(xí)、模仿高水平的論文 例題解析： l You work for a company which produces laser printers．You are visiting another company，Softcell, to buy some computer software for your department．They have expressed an interest in your company’s printers and you would like to take twenty brochures and three sample printers with you． 相關(guān)詞匯：laser, inkjet, projector (Barco), photocopier (Xerox), fax machine, scanner, computer, monitor 相關(guān)詞匯：company literature; brochure; leaflet; flyer; white book; data sheet; prospectus l Write a short note to Mr. Jim Asano，the Sales Manager． l Asking for his permission to take these items． l Explaining why you want them． l Mentioning the time and date when you want to collect them． Write 40-50 words on your Answer Sheet. 便函便條類題目的結(jié)構(gòu) Input: situation description Task: memo, note, email content points Write: internal message (40-50 words) 注意：格式；發(fā)揮部分要確切 評分標(biāo)準(zhǔn) BEC寫作評分方法 級別 第一部分分?jǐn)?shù) 5 全部完成答題要求 l 所有內(nèi)容點都已包括在內(nèi)并在答題要求允許的情況下加以發(fā)揮 l 語言規(guī)范、自然；錯誤最少，均屬小錯。 l 多樣化的語言結(jié)構(gòu)和豐富的詞匯量。 l 組織效果好，注意前后呼應(yīng)。 l 語域和格式完全適當(dāng)。 給讀者的印象極佳。 9或10分 4 較好的完成答題要求 l 所有內(nèi)容點都處理得不錯。 l 大體準(zhǔn)確；運用復(fù)雜語言時有錯誤。 l 結(jié)構(gòu)合理，用詞準(zhǔn)確。 l 大體上組織較好，注意邏輯關(guān)系。 l 語域和格式總體來說適當(dāng)。 給讀者的印象良好。 7或8分 3 尚能達到答題要求 l 所有的主要內(nèi)容點已包括進去，遺漏了一些次要的內(nèi)容。 l 出現(xiàn)一些錯誤，但不妨礙交流。 l 結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯掌握范圍適度。 l 組織和安排總的來說令人滿意。 l 語域和格式尚可，雖然并不完全成功。 給讀者的印象較好。 5或6分 2 不能完全達到答題要求 l 遺漏了一些主要的內(nèi)容點或者處理得不充分，可能有些不切題。 l 有時錯誤影響清楚交流，錯誤較多，使讀者感到迷惑。 l 結(jié)構(gòu)、詞匯掌握范圍有限。 l 內(nèi)容條理不清、不連貫，造成理解困難。 l 語域和格式不適當(dāng)。 給讀者的印象不佳。 3或4分 1 未能達到答題要求 l 顯著的內(nèi)容遺漏/或大量內(nèi)容不相關(guān)，可能由于對題目要求的誤解。 l 嚴(yán)重不規(guī)范，經(jīng)常出現(xiàn)基本錯誤。 l 題目要求的結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯幾乎沒有提到。 l 缺乏組織，造成交流失敗。 l 幾乎沒有使用適當(dāng)?shù)恼Z域和格式。 給讀者的印象極差。 1或2分 0 什么要求也沒達到。字?jǐn)?shù)少于所需字?jǐn)?shù)的25%，或是完全不能辨認(rèn)或是完全不切題。 0分 注意：content; accuracy; conciseness 【例題】 l Christmas is coming. Your company is going to hold the annual Christmas party. As the secretary of the general manager, you help arrange the preparation for it. l Write a memo to all employees. l Announcing the planned party. l Welcoming all employees to join it. l Introducing the programs of it. l Mention the time and place that it takes place. l Write 40—50 words on your Answer Sheet． 商務(wù)書信類 這一題型要求考生根據(jù)所提供的短文，如書信、傳真、便函、留言條(電話留言條)等，起草一封書信，字?jǐn)?shù)要求達到120—140詞左右。 題目結(jié)構(gòu)： Input: 1 situation description 2 task 3 target reader Reading: texts in note, letter, fax, memo + content points (handwritten notes; second letter) Write: business letter (120-140 words) 注意英美拼寫問題 【例題】 l You have organised a production conference for your company which will be held on 10 October 2005. The following is the letter of confirmation you received from the Conference Centre. l Read the letter and fax below, which gives details of the conference. l Then, using all information from the fax, write your letter to John Smith at the Nuffield Conference Centre, explaining the changes to the arrangements. l Do not include postal addresses. l Write 120-140 words on separate sheet.  Dear Conference Organiser, I am writing to confirm the arrangements for the conference. DATE AND TIME: 10th October-10 a.m. to 5 p.m. NUMBER OF GUESTS: 50 ROOMS RESERVED 10 a. m. to 12: 30 p.m. CONFERENCE HALL 3 2 p.m. to 5 p.m. SEMINAR ROOMS 1, 2, and 3 CATERING: Coffee--11 a.m. to 11:30 a.m. Lunch-12:30p.m. to 2p.m. Conference Centre Restaurant Tea-4 p.m. We look forward to welcoming your company to the Nuffield Conference Centre. Yours faithfully, John Smith Today your Production Manager has sent you the fax below with changes he would like to make to the conference arrangements FAX I’m afraid we have to make some last-minute changes to the arrangements for our production conference. 1. Ten more guests have accepted. 2. The President wants only one hour for lunch, and just a simple buffet-not seated in the restaurant. The Conference Speaker（Tom Moors）can’t come until 2 pm. So he will give his presentation in the afternoon. Can we move the seminars to the morning? Sorry about this! Sam 注意：1 不要跑題 2 適當(dāng)發(fā)揮 3 目標(biāo)讀者 4 不要抄襲 三種對策： a 換句型 e.g. This rule applies in every case. There are no exceptions to the rule. (肯定句變否定句) b 換同義詞 e.g. The arguments put forward by these two authors are nearly the same. The views expressed by the two writers are almost identical. c 改詞性 e.g. The English language has had a major impact on developing other world languages. Other world languages have been greatly affected by the English language in their developments. 商務(wù)報告類 【例題】 l You recently attended a one-day course on office management. Below is the course programme, with the comments you wrote on it. l Write a short report about the course for your Manager. Include all your comments and say whether your company should send other staff on this course. Write 120-140 words. l Write on your Answer Sheet. Do not write in capital letters. good, practical… very general, nothing new OFFICE MANAGEMENT SEMINAR Field House, London 26 May 1999 PROGRAMME 9.00-10.45 Managing people and developing productive Working relationships 10.45-11.00 Coffee 11.00-12.45 Planning the day, work-flow, prioritising 12.45-1.30 Lunch 1.30-3.15 Problem-solving and decision-making 3.15-3.30 Tea 3.30-5.00 Staff appraisal and staff development useful ideas fell asleep! too short to meet people Recommend? 第二講 BEC寫作的語言、語法、組織和文體 評分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)： 級別 第一部分分?jǐn)?shù) 第二部分分?jǐn)?shù) 5 全部完成答題要求 l 所有內(nèi)容點都已包括在內(nèi)并在答題要求允許的情況下加以發(fā)揮 l 語言規(guī)范、自然；錯誤最少，均屬小錯。 l 多樣化的語言結(jié)構(gòu)和豐富的詞匯量。 l 組織效果好，注意前后呼應(yīng)。 l 語域和格式完全適當(dāng)。 給讀者的印象極佳。 9或10分 18或20分 4 較好的完成答題要求 l 所有內(nèi)容點都處理得不錯。 l 大體準(zhǔn)確；運用復(fù)雜語言時有錯誤。 l 結(jié)構(gòu)合理，用詞準(zhǔn)確。 l 大體上組織較好，注意邏輯關(guān)系。 l 語域和格式總體來說適當(dāng)。 給讀者的印象良好。 7或8分 14或16分 3 尚能達到答題要求 l 所有的主要內(nèi)容點已包括進去，遺漏了一些次要的內(nèi)容。 l 出現(xiàn)一些錯誤，但不妨礙交流。 l 結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯掌握范圍適度。 l 組織和安排總的來說令人滿意。 l 語域和格式尚可，雖然并不完全成功。 給讀者的印象較好。 5或6分 10或12分 2 不能完全達到答題要求 l 遺漏了一些主要的內(nèi)容點或者處理得不充分，可能有些不切題。 l 有時錯誤影響清楚交流，錯誤較多，使讀者感到迷惑。 l 結(jié)構(gòu)、詞匯掌握范圍有限。 l 內(nèi)容條理不清、不連貫，造成理解困難。 l 語域和格式不適當(dāng)。 給讀者的印象不佳。 3或4分 6或8分 1 未能達到答題要求 l 顯著的內(nèi)容遺漏/或大量內(nèi)容不相關(guān)，可能由于對題目要求的誤解。 l 嚴(yán)重不規(guī)范，經(jīng)常出現(xiàn)基本錯誤。 l 題目要求的結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯幾乎沒有提到。 l 缺乏組織，造成交流失敗。 l 幾乎沒有使用適當(dāng)?shù)恼Z域和格式。 給讀者的印象極差。 1或2分 2或4分 0 什么要求也沒達到。字?jǐn)?shù)少于所需字?jǐn)?shù)的25%，或是完全不能辨認(rèn)或是完全不切題。 0分 0分 評分五個方面： 1 content 2 language 3 structure & vocabulary 4 organisation 展開論述上面的5個方面 1 內(nèi)容的完整性 2 語言 6C原則 1．準(zhǔn)確(correctness) 包括四層意義，即閱讀人能理解、接受的英語水平；使用精確措詞，傳達準(zhǔn)確信息；正確地使用語法和標(biāo)點符號；拼寫正確。 (1)恰當(dāng)?shù)恼Z言風(fēng)格 請比較下面兩組例詞： Formal Informal approximately inquire ascertain obtain assist participate construct purchase contribute sufficient difficult utilize About Ask find out receive help share build buy give enough hard use (2)準(zhǔn)確的措詞和信息 下面列出的是一系列極易混淆的單詞及詞組，請注意區(qū)分： a lot / allot all right / alright cannot / can not different from / different than . due to / because of effect / affect fewer / less lie / lay principal / principle that /which their / them / they re wait for / wait on who / whom (3)正確的語法和標(biāo)點符號 (4)正確的拼寫 2．清楚(Clarity) (1)邏輯布局(Logical Organization) 常用的邏輯布局方法包括： ①因果關(guān)系(Cause & Effect) ②時間順序(Chronological Development) ③序列順序(Sequential Development) ④比較(Comparison) ⑤一般到特殊(From General to Specific) ⑥特殊到一般(From Specific to General) (2)合理構(gòu)架句群與段落(Well-Written Sentences & Paragraphs) 例句： 修改前: Marshall Corporation was founded forty years ago, and it now has branch offices in four states, and it employs nearly 400 individuals. 修改后: Marshall Corporation was founded forty years ago. With branch offices in four states, it now employs nearly 400 individuals. (3)統(tǒng)一性與一致性(Unity and Coherence) (4)強調(diào)(Emphasis) ①位置 ②重復(fù) ③數(shù)量 ④技巧 (5) 將句中關(guān)系緊密的詞盡量靠近。 比較下面三對句子： A. They bought a bicycle in Beijing in a small shop which costs $ 25.00. They bought a bicycle for $25.00 in a small shop in Beijing. B. He was warned not to drink water even in a restaurant which had not been boiled. He was warned not to drink water which had not been boiled. C. Those who work rapidly get ill in these conditions. Those who work in these conditions rapidly get ill. (6) 避免在同一個句子中使用意義不同的同一個字。 We shall take a firm line with the firm． We shall take a strong line with the film． 3．簡潔(Conciseness) A. We have begun to export our machine to countries abroad. We have begun to export our machines. B. In the event that you speak to Mr. Wood in regard to production, ask him to give consideration to the delivery schedule. If you speak to Mr. Wood about production, ask him to consider the delivery schedule. C .We require furniture which is of the new type. We require new-type furniture. (1) 使用簡潔的語言(Use simple language) 盡量使用 避免使用 please will you be good enough to prefer express a preference for because for the reason that (2) 少用陳詞濫調(diào)(Omit trite expressions) as the case may be it has come to my attention at an early age avail yourself of this opportunity previous to crack of dawn pursuant to your request take the liberty to due to the fact that thanking you in advance enclosed herein this is to inform you under separate cover with kindest regards I wish to state (3) 避免冗長的表達方式和不必要的重復(fù)(avoid wordy expressions & unnecessary repetition)。 Wordy Concise 1. We would like to please 2. For the month of August for August 3. Pursuant to the end of this week now 4. A long period of time a long time 5. At this time now 6. Is at this time is 7. The weight was higher than the weight was greater than 8. I expected it to be expected 9. During the year of 1995 during 1995 10. For the development of for developing 11. In the city of Dallas in Dallas 12. The problem was that the car would not the car would not start start 13. Square in shape square 14. in accordance with your request you requested 15. Sign on the front of this form sign this form 16. During the time that while 17. Consensus of opinion we agree 18. Remember the fact that remember 19, Held a meeting met 20. this is the situation at this time now (4)刪改無關(guān)緊要的成份(Remove unneeded facts) A. It should be noted that this is the best we can do, B. For your information we enclose a catalogue. C. Please be advised that we have received your invoice. 1. as soon as possible by July 10 2. as you indicated in your letter as you indicated 3. at all times always 4. at this time now 5. continue to utilize the old form until start using the new form on February such time as the new form is available 6. despite the fact that despite 7. for the month of April for April 8. for obvious reason that because 9. I would ask that you please I0. in conjunction with with 11. in the mere recent past recently 12. in the unlikely event that if 13. in the unlikely event that I am unable to if I am late, please delay the meeting be on time, please delay the meeting 14. in view of the fact that because 15. it will be greatly appreciated if you please 16. our production of the new product will production will begin on July 1 commence on July 1 17. please be advised that we expect you to please review the contract review the enclosed contract (5)多使用主動語態(tài)的句子結(jié)構(gòu)以明確表達意思。 Payment of their accounts will be made by Johnsons next week． Johnsons will pay their accounts next week． 4．具體(Concreteness) (1) 盡可能地提供明確、具體的信息。 A. These brakes can stop a car within a short distance. These Goodson power brakes can stop a 2-ton car within 24 feet. B. We hope the equipment will be delivered to our company as soon as possible. Please deliver the equipment to our company before next Friday. C. She is a fast typist. She types at the fast rate of 85 words per minute. (2) 使用具體詞匯 A. We have no hesitation in advising you… We advise you… B. The preparation of new price scale is in hand. New price scales are being prepared this week. C. Due to the unusual nature of the request,… As the request is unusual,… a great deal of time, bad, large, good, small, around, old, convenient, young, little, majority, minority, most, less 5．完整(Completeness) 自查：誰(Who)? 什么(What)? 什么時候(When)? 在哪里(Where)? 為什么(Why)? 怎么樣(How)? 6．禮貌(Courtesy) 例如： Dear Mrs. Walters, Because you delayed so long in your response, Model GSF is off stock. If you are interested, we have some similar models on hand Yours truly, 修改： Dear Mrs. Walters If I had known your needs before May 20, I could have shipped Model GSP immediately. However, the spring sale drained our stock. The Model GSK, a similar instrument, is in stock, and you could have it at the same price as the GSF. It normally sells for $10,000 more. we will ship it as soon as you give us the word. Yours sincerely (1) 使用禮貌友好的詞匯 A. 說“Thank you" , 例如: Thank you for your letter of yesterday. Thank you for your prompt reply. Thank you for helping us in this respect. Thank you for your information. (2)體諒對方的寫作態(tài)度(You-Attitude) Writer emphasis: We are shipping your order on Friday. Reader emphasis: You will receive your order by Monday, October 10. Writer emphasis: To reduce our costs, we are changing the billing system. Reader emphasis: To provide you with clear records, we are changing our billing system. Writer emphasis: I was pleased to hear that the project was completed. Reader emphasis: Congratulations on successfully completing the project Writer emphasis: We regret that you closed your account with us a week ago. We believe that people may come back to our bank again sooner or later since we have a good credit among our customers. Reader emphasis: A week ago you closed your account with us. Whatever the reason, we are pleased to have played some small part in your program. You are cordially invited to use our other services as occasion may require. (3) 措辭得體(Appropriate Wording) a．避免采用消極性的詞匯或句式 Negative Wording: The office is closed after four Oclock, Positive Wording: The office is open until four Oclock. Negative Wording: When I received your complaint, I checked our records. Positive Wording: When I received your letter, I checked our records. Negative Wording: Because you failed to connect the cable, the picture was blurred. Positive Wording: The picture was blurred because the V-2 cable was not connected to the terminal. Negative Wording: You did not read my recent letter. Positive Wording: Please refer to my June 10th letter. Negative Wording: The Executive Board did not receive notification. Positive Wording: Several members of the Executive Board inquired about the time of our December meeting. Will you please send them a follow-up? Negative Wording: Your letter was not clear. Positive Wording: I would appreciate an outline of our marketing differences that you mentioned in your October 14th letter. b.有失禮貌的言詞 We deny your claim complaint We do not believe confusion We are not sure contrary We find it difficult to understand contrivance We expect delinquent We insist deny We are forced disagreeable We take issue exasperate You forgot failure You neglected ignorance You failed to impatience You misunderstood incompetent You must incredible You should know inexcusable You do not have inference You are delinquent insincere You insist that insinuate You did not say insulting Your ignoring intolerable Your credit refusal irresponsible Your recent complaint irritated Your failure to lack Your misunderstanding neglect Your neglectful attitude objection Your disregard for obnoxious Your insinuation offensive Your lack of communication unbelievable Your delinquent account uncooperative (4)避免使用有性別歧視之嫌的詞語 A．用“person”代替第三人稱單數(shù)。 例如: Instead of: Please share this report with your supervisor. He will find it interesting. Say: Please share this report with your supervisor, who will find it interesting. B．有一些常用的商務(wù)英語詞匯有性別歧視之嫌，應(yīng)該稍加改變。 Instead of Say Businessman workmen Chairman Foremen Salesman Spokesman Stockboy Workman business person employees/worker chairperson supervisors sales representative / sales person spokesperson stock clerk employee / worker (5) 及時答復(fù)(Timely Response) 例：We will examine your camera to determine the shutter-response problem and have it back to you within three weeks, if repairs axe needed, I will call you for approval to make the repairs. 例：Mr. Smith is out of the office until the end of the month. I am sure he will be able to provide you with all of the information you requested when he returns. 連貫和銜接 （一）連貫 (coherence) 常見連接詞有： 1表示羅列增加 　　First, second, third, 　　First, then / next, after that / next, finally 　　For one thing … for another…, 　　On (the) one hand…on the other hand, 　　Besides / what’s more / in addition / furthermore / moreover / another / also, 　　Especially / In particular, 2表示時間順序 　　now, at present, recently, 　　after, afterwards, after that, after a while, in a few days, 　　at first, in the beginning, to begin with, 　　later, next, finally, 　　immediately, soon, suddenly, all of a sudden, at that moment, as soon as, the moment 　　form now on, from then on, 　　at the same time, meanwhile, 　　till, not…until, before, after, when, while, as during, 3表示解釋說明 　　now, in addition, for example, for instance, in this case, moreover 　　furthermore, in fact, actually 4表示轉(zhuǎn)折關(guān)系 　　but, however